Camp News & Blog

What Signal Do You Send?

October 25th, 2024

Campers, we have a bit of greenery at camp I bet you’ve never noticed. In front of the Dining Hall, there are two (very) tall ‘signal cedars’, one on either side of the main stairs onto the porch. While I don’t have any records to back this up, I bet they were planted there in the late 1970s when the Dining Hall was originally built. Over the past 40+ years, they’ve grown to over 30’ in height.

“So… why are these important and why, Cole, are you bringing them up now?” That’s a good question – I’m glad you asked.

Signal Cedars

Per my cousin who owns a ranch at which two of these massive trees stand, they’ve been used all over the country for a very long time. They are planted outside of homes, at the front of neighborhoods, outside of schools and churches and many other spots.

The purpose of the trees are to broadcast to everyone who can see them ‘you are welcome here.’ Now, you’d be hard pressed to see them in front of our Dining Hall, even from the Main Gate. But, when we visited our cousin’s ranch in Arizona, the Kelly boys and I could see the signal cedars planted outside their home from miles away.

Imagine riding on your horse or in your wagon as you moved West across the country. You’d be hungry, thirsty, dirty from the trail and more tired than you can imagine. And then, as you cross a high pass and look down in the valley, these trees stand out to you. They are a beacon of ‘welcome’, of hospitality in a sometimes-inhospitable world. You’d point your wagon their way.

What’s Your Signal?

If you’d not yet noticed, there is an election going on in the US. Those who are old enough and eligible will cast their ballots on local, state and federal elections between now and November 5th. There are a lot people who will be happy with the results. There will be a lot of people unhappy with them.

And, we still have to move forward as a community and a nation. We still need to be those people who welcome in those who need help, whether we agree or not with their choice of civil servants.

So… what kind of signal to you send out? We don’t have trees that can grow out of our heads that tell people, ‘stop on by!’ I’m sure that would do the exact opposite, in fact.

No, we’ve got a figure out another way. Here are a few that come to mind quickly:

  1. Do you smile easily and look people in the eye? Research shows that people who make eye contact and smile are rated much more approachable than others, regardless of their gender, ethnicity, socio-economic situation, political or religious views.
  2. What are you saying on the socials? The whole world is a billboard now and the view is through your comments, likes, posts, etc. on X, tiktok, Facebook and more. Marcus Aurelius reminds us that “Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.” Are you being humble and willing to listen?
  • How do you act towards someone who can’t do a bit of good for you in the long term? Here’s a question: do you know the janitor’s name in your school or your building? What about the person who delivers your mail mixes your fun drink at the local store?

We are so pre-occupied with people who we’ll (most likely) never meet that we fail to get to know – even a little – the people make the small world around us better… even a little.

  • Do you accept there are different viewpoints and culture as your own? We are lucky at Weequahic to have campers from 16 different US states and 12 different countries. What our campers from China experience is very different than those from Bethesda or Houston.

What can be thought as ‘acceptable opinions’ in Iowa could be different than those same choices on Long Island. AND THAT’S ACTUALLY GOOD! The greatest progress is made by people gathering together, sharing their viewpoints and knowledge and working, hand in hand, towards a common good.

Build Better Habits… and Show Courage

If you want to be better at sending ‘welcoming’ signals, smile more, look people in the eye, get to know their names. Reduce your focus from way, way out there to right around you, right now. (Like we do at camp!)

You may feel like you are missing out… at first. But, just like when we live for a day or two at camp phone-free, we realize all we need and want is right around us.

This is a habit, something that is formed with intentional effort over time until it becomes simply routine. And, it’s a routine that will make you more approachable, more welcoming. It’ll be your signal.

Have a great weekend.

We Should vs. I Will

October 18th, 2024

One of the most incredible discoveries of the 20th century concerned the structure of light. That which comes from the sun (and the tiny light above my seat on the plane as I type this) is both a wave and a collection of tiny packets of energy. Imagine millions of little ping pong balls of energy moving together to form a wave. Pretty awesome. (I like to think of it as the turtles jet stream-scene from Finding Nemo.)

This discovery helped to explain a lot of physics that I don’t understand… though I’m very happy it happened. Regardless of the science, for the purposes of this little campfire lesson, it’s how light is constructed – millions of packets of energy acting, moving and dancing together – that’s important.

We Should vs. I Will

We live in a great country. Do we have problems? Of course. In fact, if you read the news, you’d think things have never been worse. However, if you are a reader of history or a person that looks behind the sensational to look at the actual data… well, a very good argument could be made that things have never been better.

We live in a country where people lend a helping hand their neighbor. How do I know? Because one of our boys lives in Boone, NC where a once-in-a-100-year-storm left enormous devastation. Many people who live outside the town are now weeks without power and drink and eat only from the gifts and service of others.

There were a lot of people saying ‘we should’ do something… and then not doing anything. However, the gifts and service that is happening came from a collection of individuals (or ‘I’s’) doing something about the problem. The ‘we shoulds’ around the country did nothing but lend an opinion. Those who spent their time and their resources to aid these people are those who said ‘I will.’

When the collection of ‘I wills’ became strong enough, they became a wave that stared to bring the light of community and warmth of support to the people of Boone and Ashville and Blowing Rock and so many other places. This is true in almost every other ‘help needed’ situation out there… including camp.

‘We should’ is an opinion, a small set of words in the wind. They mean nothing.

“We should be welcoming to a new camper in our bunk.” Absolutely. Now – HOW do you do it and, looking back, DID you?

“We should confront a friend who is being mean.” Totally. Did you?

“We should be kind to one another, even when we disagree on something like food, religion, video games, or who our parents vote for.” Absolutely. Did you act so?

It Takes Courage

‘We should’ works only when it’s followed by at least one ‘I will.’ One person stepping forward with the courage and humility to act can and will draw others. Courage, just like fear, is contagious. 

Maya Angelou once said:

Courage is the most important of all the virtues because, without courage, you can’t practice any other virtue consistently.

Of, as Winston Churchill stated:

“Courage is rightly considered the foremost of the virtues, for upon it, all others depend”

It’s the exercise of courage that turns ‘we should’ into a whole bunch of ‘I wills.’ Doesn’t mean you are always right (or wrong). But at least you’ll be doing something that can be reviewed and changed, if needed.

So… go be an ‘I will’ rather an a ‘we should.’ As President Adams enocouraged his children: Be good and do good.

Safe and Uncomfortable

October 4th, 2024

As I take in the wonders of Westchester County from my rising flight back home, I start thinking about a conversation I had with an almost 100-year-old great-grandparent this past weekend. (Have to admit – I was a little starstruck… not often I get to have a family member that experienced listening in on a camp conversation.)

I got a speak with him a little after the parents sent the kids to play. It was incredible. He talked about what his family had to do to survive the Great Depression. How they moved. What they drove in and how long it took. Growing their own food and so much more.

He used these lessons and built a great business which went through a lot of hard times but is, ultimately, still in the family. He had to deal with a lot of hard things. He participated in a World War, watched the Civil Rights struggles, saw the moon landing, and so much more.

All the while, he had his head down, taking care of his family, his community, his business… which will now send his great grandkids to camp. Incredible.

Some Challenges

I know we all believe there is a lot going wrong in our world. I’ve got good friends who children are in the IDF. Families are being divided along political and ideological lines. A lot of my friends in Appalachia are really suffering from the recent massive flood. And yet…

A recent note from someone I appreciate said: if we read the news, it’s never been worse. But if we read history, things have never been better. Can it be both? Perhaps… but it’s all how we decide to view things.

An author I enjoy (the Wait But Why guy) has a very interesting book out. He covers a lot of topics very thoughtfully, I believe. One thing he mentioned when speaking about his college experience: his professors told him they wanted him to be safe and uncomfortable in their classroom.

I love that. And, of course… it reminded me of camp.

Safe and Uncomfortable at Camp

Let’s not sugar-coat (or fiber-coat, in this case?) things at Weequahic…. It’s pretty cushy. Instant hot water heaters? Heated pool? Air-conditioned Dining Hall? Three meals & three snacks a day? Canteen? Cookies every Friday night?

Cushy.

And yet… it’s still uncomfortable for many of our campers.

Living away from home. Living in a bunk with 10 other kids and three staff members you’ve just met (for our newest campers) or friends from past summers for our returners. The food is good… but it’s at certain times and Uber Eats is not running our way anytime soon. Oh… and no tech. (The HORROR!) Our campers are out of their rhythms and out of their comfort zones.

And. It. Is. So. GOOD for them. Safe… and uncomfortable.

The amount of leaning when you move out of your comfort zone (just enough) is impressive. Independence starts to grow. Courage starts to grow. The world begins to open up. The comfort zone begins to expand.

You begin to see discomforts for what they are – stepping stones of future grown or something temporary not spend a moment dwelling upon.  You realize you can make friends with others without your parents around or school or video games.

That’s the gift of camp. A community built with kids at the heart of it – fun, safe and, at useful times, uncomfortable.

Easy will lull us to sleep. Easy will have us waking up in a world of ‘Wall-E’ lethargy. It’ll help us produce generations who lack grit, determination, independence and more. Camp is not the complete answer to this challenge… but it certainly can be a part of the answer.

Let’s help our kids be safe… and uncomfortable. Have a good weekend!